The Real RVD
by DarkSeductress
Summary: Someone has the whole locker room trembling in fear. Someone no one would ever expect... OneShot, R rating for strong language. It's just humor folks.


October 24, 2003

"**The Real RVD"**

**By**: Dark Seductress

**Summary**: Someone has the whole locker room trembling in fear. Someone no one would ever expect.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own RVD or any of the other superstars mentioned in this story.

**Author's Note**: This story is strictly a joke, made to be funny. Just my dark sense of humor.

**Feedback**: The author is hungry!

**Distribution**: Just ask.

There was anxious laugh and quiet conversations amongst the WWE superstars as they begin to warm up in the locker room. Then the door opened and every thing wentsilent. _He_ had finally arrived and as usual he was not in a good mood. He sneered as he kicked bags, random limbs, and elbowed people out his way to get to his spot in the back. He chuckled with sadistic mirth as superstars hissed and knocked each other over to remove themselves from his path. The chuckle stopped as he focused on the soon-to-be-corpse in his spot. It was that new kid they called_ The Next Big Thing_. Everyone held their breath as they realized poor Brock was about to become _The Next Dead Thing_.

" If you wish to continue breathing, I suggest you remove your ass from my seat." He snarled, hands clenching and unclenching at his side.

"Are you talking to me?" Brock asked arrogantly.

"Who else would I fucking be talking to? You're the biggest dumbass in a room of dumbasses cause you're sitting in my seat." The man growled.

"I don't see your name here." Brock stated slightly confused. _This guy was supposed to nice and easy going, what the hell was his problem? Bad day, perhaps?_

The man chuckled coldly, he was going to have some fun tonight. He could hurt somebody. He dropped his bags at his side, he'd have to teach this rookie a lesson and then have a little chat with Paul Heyman.

"I'm sorry, Brock, I realize I have confused you. Cavemen don't speak English, contrary to popular belief. So let me do this the easiest way possible." Then he gave him a slow condescending smile as other superstars scattered. The man proceeded to yank Brock up by the collar of his shirt and hurl him into a locker, which promptly dented to the imprint of Brock's head.

There was a gasp among the female counter parts of the locker and urgency among the males to remove Brock from his current position before he got up and brought more pain on himself. But the attacker wasn't pleased or sedated yet. He crossed the room to a staggering Brock and stood before him. The superstars once helping him, jumped away as if he were diseased.

"You asshole, I'll demolish you!" Brock shouted before receiving a punching to the nose, which sprouted blood in every direction.

"What's going on here! Where's Brock?" Paul Heyman demanded pushing his way through the crowd.

"You should teach your bitch some manners." The man snarled before stalking off to his corner of the room.

Paul Heyman stared from Brock to his attacker and back. He inwardly groaned. Brock had just inadvertently made an enemy out of the most vicious man in all the wrestling world. A man that held grudges like glue and didn't forget not one damn thing. The man was an animal.

Paul slowly walked over to him, leaving Brock to his own devices, and cleared his voice.

"What?" The man growled.

"Robert, I'm very sorry that Brock offended you. I can't imagine what got into him." Heyman stated sweetly, shaking with fear.

"That bitch was in my seat." Rob snarled.

"Which will never happen again." Heyman tried to smile but with all his shaking, it turned to a grimace.

"It better not. Now get the hell out of my sight. You sicken me." Rob dismissed Heyman, who slowly backed away.

Rob promptly pulled out his gear and began to suit up as a thought hit him, who was he going to get to destroy tonight? He chuckled with sadistic pleasure as his eyes scanned the locker room; the Hardly boy was shaking with fear in Lita's arms, the Hurricane was trying to look inconspicious in bright green, Kane was trying to hide behind Trish, Test and Scott were both trying to use Stacey as a human shield, Jericho and Christian were fighting to squeeze into the biggest locker, and Stone Cold.....itmust have beenhim cause he was making his way over to Rob.

"Hey, Rob, I don't mean to interrupt ya or anything but I need to have a word with you." Steve mumbled averting his eyes in every direction but Rob's eyes.

Rob growled. It took all his effort not to burst with laughter. The toughest son of a bitch in the world was cowering before him because they had match and he wanted Rob to play nice....fat chance. Steve wasn't shaking.....yet. But he was moving from one foot to another, being rather antsy in Rob's opinion. Rob smirked, he'd play along with Steve....for a minute anyway.

"What can I help you with, Steven?" Rob smiled sweetly, turning his direct attention to the corpse invading his breathing space.

Steve recoiled a step back, something wasn't right if Rob was smiling, "We have a match together tonight and I was wondering you could go a bit easy on me."

Rob grinned broadly as he listened to Steve's voice squeak, "I didn't know we had a match, Steven. But I thought I was easy with everyone."

"Easier." Steve squeaked. "Please, Rob, my back is killing me tonight and my knees are already bad. Just be nice, please. I'd do anything for ya." It came out in a rush and Rob suddenly tired of playing with Steve. In fact, he was disgusted. _And he calls himself the rattle snake, I got an animal for him the pussy cat...._

"I'm offended, Steve." Rob suddenly stood up.

"You are?" Steve took a step back.

"You're breathing my air. You've interrupted my life by approaching me in public. And you've ruined my day by making me acknowledge the fact that you live." Rob walked a step closer witheach statement, to which Steve took a step back. "But there is something you can do for me, Steve."

Steve's face suddenly lit up, "What's that?"

Rob grinned before promptly kicking him in the stomach and stunning him on the concrete floor in the middle of the locker room. He snarled as he returned to his seat. He desperately needed a separate locker room because Vince wouldn't be pleased if half the roster belonged to the injured list, then again he could just beat Vince's ass. The thought made him smile but it quickly faded when he watched the Brama Shit and the Olympic Jackass waltz into his locker room high-fiving each other. They immediately ran over to Steve's aid and lifted him off the ground. _Damn, do-gooders, I was enjoying watching him whimper...._

Then Rob rolled his eyes as they proceeded to march over within ten feet of him.

"Robert, you should be ashamed of yourself." Kurt huffed. "Hurting poor Steven when he was asking for was some consideration."

"Kiss my ass." Rob growled before returning to his boots.

"Kurt's right. Vince will not be pleased, this is the tenth person this week including Brock, Undertaker, Bradshaw, Bastisa, Rikishi, Show, Albert, Kevin Nash, Hogan, and Goldberg. What did they do, Rob, what did they do?" The Rock lectured.

"They breathed, just like you're doing, you Brama Bitch." Rob glared. The Rock gulped air and took a step back for good measure. He should have never made that promise to Vince, that he wouldn't attack the Rock and Kurt Angle as long as they stayed ten feet away from him. Vince was a smart old bastard but Rob could always destroy that contract and then.....open season......

"Honestly, how do you expect to have any friends if you beat them all up?" Kurt pleaded. "We know you're a nice guy, Robert, you just-"

Rob instantly was offended. Him? Nice? Don't beat your sweet ass. He must beat up more people if that belief was still running around.

"Why don't you come a little closer, you Olympic Bastard? I'll show you how nice I can be." Rob smiled suddenly beckoning Kurt with his middle finger.

Kurt waved a finger at Rob, "You got us last time with that, it won't work twice."

"Damn...." Rob looked crestfallen. It was time for his match anyway. Suddenly he growled. "Get out of my sight before I decide to break my contract." He stretched a little before grabbing Austin by the collar of his vest. The man was crying and kicking and whimpering.....Honestly, why couldn't he face his demise like a man? Why was everyone in the locker such a bitch? Why were they all stuck on his nice guy image? It was just a fucking image. Surely, they didn't think the Hurricane could actually fucking fly. Surely....they didn't.....but then again he could if Rob threw him high enough....

Rob stopped in front of Kurt Angle and the Rock. He glared, "Interrupt my match and contract or no, I'll beat your asses. And don't worry, I'll leave enough of this bitch for you to scrape off the mat. Now out of my way." Rob pushed each one of them in the forehead with his free hand before continuing to drag Austin's fighting body steadily toward his doom.

As Rob left the locker room, he heard a collective sigh of relief, that caused him to smile. They just didn't realize, he'd be back and they would be next.

Fin


End file.
